23 December 2009
The Act of Compromise
Posted by Moss under: Business .
Conflict is inevitable. People have different perspectives, interpretations, and assumptions about what happens. Throw in competing needs, dislikes, goals, and expectations and you can bet that conflicts will surface.
A key difference between a victim and a navigator partnership has to do with locus of control, e.g. defining the force that makes things happen. Victims see upset and conflict as something that is “happening to them.” Navigators are more likely to look at their own role in creating, perpetuating, or compounding a problem.
Navigators also have a number of strategies they can choose from in their conflict resolution toolbox. Five strategies stand out:
- Competing: “I win, you lose.”
- Collaborating: “We both win.”
- Compromise: “Lets split the difference.”
- Accommodating: “You win, I don’t.”
- Avoiding: “Let’s not talk about it.”
What tool is best? It depends!
- Life and death: Compete
- Important to your partner: Accommodate
- Not important: Avoid
- Important to both: Compromise/Collaborate
Bottom Line
- Don’t be defensive.
- Conflicts aren’t personal.
- Surface the real issue.
- Understand first, advocate second.
- Most of the time split the difference.
